Monday, May 23, 2011

Trials, Failures, Lessons Learned

Last week was a l-o-n-g week. I had great plans for getting back into the groove of our weekly routine, b-u-t that didn't happen. At all. 

Apparently we brought back some bugs with us from our trip. Not the crawly kind. The pukey kind. Emma was sick most of last week. And this week is Ethan's turn. Not fun.

There were a lot of umm.. 'accidents' last week as we got Ethan readjusted to using the toilet. (and they weren't no just wet ones! wasn't fun.) Our time away was a step backward for him, but he seems back on track this week (except for being a little sick). Julianna also has troubles when things are stressful, and doesn't always make it... anyway... hopefully this phase will end soon. But, with another one coming, I know we'll go through it all again! Such is the life of a mom - crappy! lol!

Well, I have learned a couple things in the trials of last week.

1. The more I seek to control my situations, the less control I actually have. This is a very stressful way to live. And I don't handle stress well, especially the unpredictable kind. After a week of fighting my situations, I failed miserably. My kids. My husband. God. So this week (and hereafter) I will begin my days alone with the Lord, yielding control to Him. Who better to let control my days, my every step, every minute? He knows what's best! Not me.

2. I can choose to react or respond. These are two different things. Reacting happens in the heat of the moment. Responding is how you have decided to react. Not that you would know ahead of time what is going to happen, but pausing before reacting, asking yourself if it's worth expending the extra energy to get angry, is it worth causing a rift in a relationship with your kids? or husband? or whoever?

3. There will always be time for dishes, laundry, and other housework. If you come over to my house, there will be toys on the floor. There will be dishes in the sink, whether they are cleaned, or waiting to be cleaned. My laundry hamper always has laundry in it. I usually have a basket of clean laundry waiting to be folded, sitting in the living room. As a mom, I have learned to let go of my perfectionism in this area. Yes, clutter drives me absolutely crazy. And sometimes my perfectionism keeps me from getting to certain tasks, because I want it done the right way the first time, and I want it done now! But 'now' is hard to come by with three demanding little ones. Yes, I have a weekly housecleaning routine, that on normal days gets done, and I can usually keep the chaos in some form of order. But sometimes weeks like last week happen. Nothing gets done. It gets overwhelming. And I wait for a new week and a fresh start to try again. So, this week, we're trying again. And we'll see what happens. I don't know what will happen tomorrow, but hopefully nothing too dramatic, cause I really need to clean my floors!

These are things that I am working on. I started this blog with the intentions of sharing the fun, the good, the successes, and the failures. As much as I really hate to admit it, I am not perfect, I do not have all the answers, and with each passing day I realize how little I think I know, and how much more there is for me to learn. Having children really opens your eyes to these things.....

I began reading in Philippians the other day. Today I read chapter two, and there were a couple of verses that the Lord opened my eyes to this morning:

Philippians 2:3-5, 13-14 (KJV) ~ Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.   
For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of His good pleasure. Do all things without murmurings and disputings.

This morning I came to the conclusion that I am truly thankful for the difficult week I went through. Sounds odd, right? But it's true, I'm not just saying that. I am so thankful for God's unfailing kindnesses, His unconditional love, and His everpresent help in time of need. And sometimes it takes going through the rough patches to truly appreciate Who He is and all He does for us.

He's still working on me
To make me what I ought to be.
It took Him just a week to make the moon and stars,
The sun and the Earth and Jupiter and Mars.

How loving and patient He must be!
He's still working on me!

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